22 May 2009

Ego of the Month Feeds Ego Babies


We have one dominant tone of ego called 'Ego of the Month'. As described by Tenzin Wangyal this dominant ego produces and feeds many 'ego babies'. The 'egolets' then mentally surround us for an ego-town meeting, with the babies lined up and cheering on the big ego into a fever-pitch of various permutations of fear - anxiety, worry, doubt and the rest of the minds grab-bag of torment.

Caught up in the babbling town meeting mind and subsumed in its narrative, gaining a quiet moment to gasp for perspective is often impossible. Rarely do we consider the glaring elephant in the room – just who is it that is talking, thinking, engaging, chattering?

BAM! When we turn our minds' gaze onto itself with the thought who? A ping of awareness sounds. When undertaken at the height of internal nattering and chattering, an alchemical transportation seems to occur and we arrive to a new, unfamiliar vantage point. More or less, it is like jumping into another persons mind-body. It feels that foreign. The experience can be likened to bolting upright out of a graphic dream, with the dream story very fresh in our psyche. Suddenly afforded a glimpse from an entirely different perspective, almost concurrently, we have gained awareness! Triumph!

In that instant of looking inward for the chattering ‘who’, I am now an observer of the babbling ego manager and babies barking their commands. They are obnoxious. There is a memorable moment when the ego entity appears far far away - a tiny, flapping, jumping, hopping, yapping puppet speck on itsy planet Self. The observer is a wise, quiet, undaunted, vast feeling that seems limitless.

I feel safe saying this is a tiny sparkle of meditative awareness.

The meditation exercise described by Tenzin Wangyal was to me like staring at a hidden, 3D message that suddenly, but just for a moment revealed itself, then sadly and frighteningly, disappeared. I saw it, and then in a flash, it was gone! There I sat, hands in lap, interpreting the experience, and later writing this blog.

How do I get back?

How do you get there?

Try it by following along with Bon spiritual teacher, Tenzin Wangyal, discuss 'transcending fear' courtesy of the Ligmincha Institute:


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